The road ahead.

Its just the usual when you have to face something that you immediately think, oh-my this is hardest thing I have to face. But as days go on and you grow older the things you have to face are something new and something even harder than the last "task".

Currently the hardest obstacle for me is choosing a pathway to take in University. There's the location, course, economical and future job factor to consider and of course the qualification factor. I am honestly worried for my SPM results but whats the point in worry about the past where we cant change right?

For now, I think I want to venture into the Hospitality road. It seems ideal and I think I have the passion for it. Thats the thing you see, I'm not sure. I never have been. There are so many things floating around in my mind right now and I cant seem to choose one to solve. I don't want to face it and I feel I cant face it just yet.

Just one more day, I tell myself.

And here I am blogging out my feelings hoping I might get to clear some things out. I think too fondly of the future. I see it in my dreams unconsciously hoping it'd be like that but who knows just what might happen.

For now I'm trying to escape the reality I have to face just until the end of the, I say. I'm hoping I can. The road ahead isn't easy but when i think about it, it wont be the hardest thing to face. In fact I'm really excited for it.

Have a happy December, to whoever that stumbles upon my blog.

Quick post.

Just a quick post because it is currently 11.30+ in the pm.

So SPM has ended which means that High school is over for me. And so far I have um.. enjoyed it very much along with daily spasms of worries about after high school life. Venturing out to the real world, I have always knew,  is never easy.

Yesterday I went out with a friend and watched Mockingjay Part 1. It was amazing. I need to wait for it to come online so I can download and rewatch in more detailed attention. Do I make sense? I also had given myself the treat of buying novels.

You see there just isnt much pleasure or fun in read ebooks. I bought Love,Rosie and had finish it within a day, which is today. It is such an amazing book. The feels it gave me urgh. I must say I am extremely happy with the ending but it doesnt cover the frustrations and those crying moments I felt while reading the book.

A photoshoot tomorrow with my friends, I'm very excited.

This is all for now as I really have to sleep.....

Just Starting,

It is now a fresh new September in another year.

I have so much to say that it feels as if the words I have are not enough.

You know how a song goes Wake Me Up When September Ends? Well this time I would say to not wake me up because at the end of this month it'll be the Mock 2 exam. I am more than nervous as the results I had for the first Mock are.. less satisfactory. I had however, expected it because I really did not study for it. With these new technology and apps on phones, I sometimes wonder if I should cry because I have this horrendous countdown app installed and constantly reminding me the leftover days. I really am trying but this week has really been impossible as I've had to help out at dad's restaurant.

Speaking of which, being able to spend all this extra time with dad has been wonderful, but having all these happy and amazing memories with dad, and mum even, would make it so much harder for me to let them go when the time comes. It hurts just to think about it, I'd break down when it happens. But I really don't want to dwell in this as I hope that there's still a long long time till I actually have to face. My childish thoughts wishes for that day to never come but death is inevitable. 

Moving on the the lighter side of things, I have finally found out what I want to do after high school. And that is to study Hospitality. Which course specifically, I am not sure yet, but that's alright, as dad says " You're still young and you have time, relax and enjoy a bit more " I never would have expected him to tell me to relax as it is my future we're talking about. But, he's right, as always. 

Also, I have gotten a new very expensive, tech savvy laptop which I am super pleased with. There has been a lot of new things this year, earlier this year I got a new hand phone and quite recently a second hand HD Tv that is still quite new and coming very soon a brand new washing machine. All the better for me as I've been doing a lot of chores as my grandmother hurt her leg. 

There's been a lot of talks about moving to new cities for college and university and although the talks are very fun, when it comes to reality it's never as fun as the idea or abstract. But that's alright, I'll let myself sink in the idea for a little while more before I instill myself in the real world once again and face the things I have to face. 

Oh. I got chosen for National service aka PLKN, it kinda sucks as it ruined my early year plans. Well, all the more for earning experience and have some adventures and maybe some great stories to tell when I'm done with those three months ( CRY ) . 

I have a lot in mind lately, but as for now this is all I can remember. It certainly is fun spending time typing away happily, expressing myself. Maybe if I have the time, I'll blog more, because there certainly has been alot that happened in the span of not blogging for 7 months. 

#Disconnected

Its really amazing how fast time flies by. Its already going to be March tomorrow and I think I'm still not done with trying to cope with this year. As of lately I haven't exactly have been in school for quite alot and I definitely haven't started studying which is what I really should be doing right now.

Sadly, the 1 assessment is coming real soon, Mid March. Oh boy. Wonderful. No. Well there goes the time ticking away as I lazily sit here on my bed trying to connect back to the social world I used to have. Whoops. Sports over, thank god. What's left of is exams, exams and more exams.

Hard as it is, Im in senior year and things are starting to sink in a little bit more that SPM is important shit that needs to be conquered. I've been so disconnected to alot of things that I used to do all the time and though it feels alittle weird I hate to admit but I am getting used to it. I mean a girls gotta do what she gotta do. And right now I gotta concentrate on studies. I guess the abandonment of my dear social life shall be bid goodbye and farewell until next time.

On the bright side, atleast I still have my phone and twitter and tumblr and okay maybe I aint thaaat disconnected to the social world but some things cant be done by using a phone, you just cant. Im listening to songs of a leaked album as I type this because I mean I can't afford to buy the album so yolo?

Even though the year 2014 is a year of important exams and life choice making, at least its a year of good movies and great songs. I seriously cAnNOT wait for the release of Divergent, The Fault In Our Stars, Mockingjay and much much more great movies. Its kind of getting on my nerves waiting.

Well thats most of it as of now :--)

2014 emergerds.

Happy New Years everybody!

The year 2013 has come to an end. Let's take a moment and congratulate ourselves for we have survived and concurred the year 2013. Weew xx

Do endure and forgive my randomness when I blog. Because I type whatever that passes through my brain and those paragraphs just cant seem to connect.

.You know those ups and downs and moments where we lose ourselves are somethings really discouraging  but I think it just matters how we stay strong survive through those blurry depressing day. For there's always light at the end of the tunnel. So congratulations for people who have survived pass those days and who knows? You prize might be really close and things will get better. For me, I found bands. And of course there's amazing friends and family. But sometimes music is the escape. 'Real bands save  fans, Real fans save bands'.

This year has been the most wonderful year I've had. There were ups and downs, bitter and sweet. I could say it was quite a balanced amount.  Big smiles. I've lost a few and gained a few but most of all this year I did soo much that I used to think was.. impossible, or at least just not within my reach

So few weeks ago me and sweet me went to Hobby Con together and I could not have been more pleased. I took photos with some amazing cosplayers and also I wore a "skort". People who know me knows that Im pretty much a tomboy. Besides the fact that I actually have some boobs I would most probably almost be a boy. Almost. The problem is,  I may be tomboyish but deep instead my heart I know how much of a big ass romanticist I am. I'll admit that right now. To at least get a taste of high school romance, that would be sweet. Totally not the right timming but.. oh, how lovely it'd be. When somethings are over, its over you know? The taste is different.

I am most certainly proud of myself. I have made changes that I thought I would never do and realized, hey, it aint all that bad. After all,  everyone just have to accept the ironic fact that change is constant. Its hard but eventually everybody will have to face it. 

I honestly just cannot wait for this year to begin as there has been many many pleasant events planned out for the start of 2014. Pleased me is very pleased. But of course, theres always the flip side to things, the contrast. The year of 2014. Senior year..woots. (Do you hear my excitement? *sarcasm*) Last year of high school is very very scary to me. As I have no ambition and no dreams and absolutely no idea of what I want to do after high school. Hence, I wont waste time this year and find out what I want to do, well, at least get an idea.

I want this year to be different. To do the things I want to do instead of just sitting around. To have no regrets. Study hard and ace that mothafking SPM. I have to. I dont wanna waste the year away. Time is moving on and it wont stop for nobody. 

So goise! Collect more great memories for next 365 days :D 

Do the things you don't usually do.

Make new different kind of memories.

Explore and find yourself. 

I gotta lose some weight. Sigh. 

Most of all!

 Have fun and Live while were young ;)

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

01.01.2014